Online Dating Tips

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So you still live at home, you haven’t dated anyone for almost a year and you’re now getting to a point where your next door neighbor is looking pretty good and she’s at least twenty years older than you are! OK, you’re officially desperate right?

You’ve tried all of mom’s tips, you’ve been to all the local watering holes and now you’re doing the online dating thing and even that’s not going so hot, but you finally convinced someone to go on a real face to face date with you so now it’s time to show your stuff.

• Skip the Shower – I know that usually you’re told to make sure you’re ship shape clean before a date. Showing up on your first date just slightly dirty and have the usual five o’clock shadow from the days work will show her you’re not a slacker – you really do work for a living!

• Wear your work clothes – unless you dress in a shirt and tie every single day she might as well see you as you are. How many of us really do wear a shirt and tie on a daily basis. Chances are not all that many of us are that comfortable anyway. It’s a blind date – she’s taking her chances right?

• Show up 5 minutes late – Why not? Women are usually late on their dates aren’t they! You’ve tried showing up early and all you manage to do is find yourself sitting alone. At least if you show up late you’ve got a chance to be there at the same time she finally shows up! Besides if she’s already there then she doesn’t know you’re desperate

• Don’t waste your time being a gentleman – Who ever said you need to hold a door open for a woman anyway? In these days of women’s liberation (hey wake up it’s been going on for years) let her open the door for you! Who ever decided that a guy should open a door and hold a chair anyway? Open the door and walk right in.

• Don’t compliment her – Hey she’s supposed to be comfortable enough to be there right? Why waste time telling her that she looks good – did she tell you that you looked good?

• Look around the place – Why not, you’ve seen her, and who knows, there might be others out there who are equally worthy of your attention! She’s going to look around anyway and see what other guys are around the place that she might be able to grab the attention of, so why shouldn’t you be on the lookout for other women?

• Ask her to pay half the bill – see comment on women’s lib above. Why can’t she pay half the bill – she ate and drank as well as you did right? If she’s single, chances are she’s working to support herself. Unless she was planning on a free ride she should expect to pay to eat. She’d have paid if you weren’t there right?

Too many women are expecting us to be on our best behavior through an entire date. Why? We’re not always on our best behavior regularly so isn’t it best that she sees us like we are. Might as well get used to it if she’s planning to ever see you again after the first date!